Armagh man Hugh pleads for help as gambling addiction spirals, costing him his relationship and threatening his home.
Hugh (not his real name) lives near Lurgan. His bets grew from small to very large. He now bets £500 or even £1,000.
Hugh recently lost his fiancée because of gambling. He fears he will soon lose his home too. He lost two loans to bookmakers in a week. The loans totaled over £5,000.
The pressure is crushing him. He once managed his addiction well. He went to Gamblers Anonymous meetings in Lurgan. These meetings helped him a lot. He didn’t gamble for over nine months.
Talking to others made a big difference. COVID stopped the Lurgan meetings. Now, meetings are in Dungannon or Newry. Hugh wonders about people without transport. He questions access to care and time constraints.
He’s angry at himself. He calls himself “pathetic”. He says getting help is hard. He wishes more was being done to address the problem.
Hugh uses GAMSTOP. This tool restricts online betting. He can still bet in local shops. Facebook competitions also pose a risk. He spends hundreds on Facebook bets.
He thinks this is wrong. Bookies know his addiction. They watch him lose money daily. No one intervenes or says anything helpful. Hugh says adverts promote “responsible gambling,” but he feels no one cares.
He says it’s a hidden problem for many. Young people are also impacted. He feels gambling effects are hidden. Drugs and alcohol show clearer effects. Hugh nearly took his own life.
His mom calls daily, offering support. He often lies and says he is doing fine. Friends know about his gambling. They may not know the full extent.
He lost his fiancée because of gambling. He worries about his mortgage, he owns a home. More loans could lead to losing it all. This thought is extremely scary. Hugh made his issue public. He wants more done to help others.
Current help options have too many barriers. His doctor referred him to Dunlewey services. After seeing his GP, he got counseling. Then 12 hourly sessions.
After that, he was on his own. Hugh finished these sessions six months ago. He gambled the next day. He desires those group meetings again.
He misses sitting with others in Lurgan. Hearing their stories of loss helped. Sharing experiences made a difference. Hugh stays busy when possible. Winter is difficult.
Being off work makes things worse. He tries to manage things. He wrote down how gambling made him feel. He detailed his day beforehand. He walked the dog and played golf.
When it got dark, he went to the bookies. He broke even but was down £680 quickly. He got lucky and quit. He felt lost and confused being there betting. The bet size does not seem to matter. He just craves the action. He knows it is hard to understand.
Hugh must visit each bookmaker to self-exclude. He would need photos and forms. This feels embarrassing to him. Online self-exclusion is much easier. Hugh wants the classes to return. It would cost little to run them again.
He feels isolated. Talking to others is vital. Being alone is difficult for him. The sounds from the bookies never leave. Those sounds remain in his head, never fading.